Tuesday, April 23, 2013

where we've been & where we're going.

You know those rides at amusement parks that spin 'round & 'round with loud music booming & everyone is yelling & screaming a mixture of excitement & fear?
Well that's where we've been lately, on that ride.
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We have a growing-like-a-weed almost 11 month old.

Bentley is into everything.
If it's on the floor, he eats it.
If it's on a table, he knocks it down.
If it's a door, he opens it.
You get the picture.

Days are long & nights are short.
Most days we feel as though we are treading water, just bobbing up & down for a breath.

We may not do things perfect but we do lots of hugs & kisses, "i love you's", & cuddles.
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We started a company last year and since day one we have been beyond blessed with business.
I cannot say how thankful we are but with that work comes alot of long hours, late dinners, & good-morning-good-nights said through a revolving door.
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We found out we were pregnant with baby #2 in late Feb.

From the minute you see that little plus sign on the test you start dreaming of names, if they will play football or dance around in tutus, etc

We found out almost two weeks ago that our baby no longer had a heartbeat.
I feel like that dr appt almost went in slow motion.
I can still hear the ringing in my ears & feel how cold the room got as I knew what my dr was about to say...

As hard as that day & the days that followed were I know it my heart it just was not our time to add another baby into our family.

I cannot say how thankful we are of the love & support that has been bestowed on us since our loss.
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So...our game plan:

Celebrating the here & now.

Enjoying our last days of Bent being a "baby".
Will he really be 1 soon?!
nah.

Drinking wine.
it's like momma-sanity in a bottle.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013